I am alone with myself, Gosh I’ve never felt so lonely and I subconsciously fear what I may learn from the parts of me I’ve never known.

I realized just how much I don’t want anything better until I am good enough with what I’ve got “me”. I was told I’m not good enough, but I still long to be the reason for someone’s smile. Wait, I thought this was about me… ” I still long to be the reason for my smile”.

I intensely long to love my curves without living my skin. I long to believe in myself. I can hear my heart talking about my mistakes, just when I am trying to love myself. It whispers my imperfections to my lungs and I forget how to keep myself alive.

I am still searching for the phenomenon of love, where I will find my soul and search no more. I long for my soul to quietly step into its destiny. I am starved for the connection with my soul.

Although I am not perfect I deserve to love myself with the same unconditional love I’ve given to others. I just need to stop defining myself!


Dear Crush


My fear of being rejected made me hate the fact that I like you.

I wish I could face you like the morning sunrise,

because seeing you makes me feel weightless.

I don’t know why I am writing this letter because you will probably never read it.

But through this letter  I want you to know that I’ve never crushed on someone so deeply.

Every time I see you my heart beats more that I can blink.

Yes I don’t know you, but I’m fascinated by your potential.

Even though I don’t know you that much I know we will spend perfect days

playing your favorite video games together.

I swear I will never complain when you want us to watch

series together.

I will love you even if everyone call you but your nickname but you want me to call you by your full name.

I will go to the gym with you and lift weights if you want me to.

I declare I will learn to paint, I will learn all the mysteries about cars

and changing car tires.

I  promise I will not take all your time by putting make up on because I

don’t even like make up.

I know I hate animals, but if you’re a dog lover I will learn to love

dogs too.

I pledge to always be there for you.

I will bring a whole new meaning to the word cuddle,

I will keep every letter you write to me, when we are apart.

I really wish you’d notice me, so you can know how thankful

I am for your existence.

Yes I don’t know you that much which also gives an opportunity

to run  wild imaginations about you.

I declare now I will give my life for you but if you fail now,

I know some part of me will surely die.